Finding Balance: A Guide for Men in Central London
- Sergio Alexander Norton
- Dec 10, 2025
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 7
Over the years, through countless conversations with clients, a pattern keeps showing up: the quiet struggle to stay true to oneself while trying to survive life and the corporate hierarchy. Many men share that they feel pulled in every direction. They strive to be good partners, fathers, friends, and responsible professionals, all while sensing their core values slowly slipping under the weight of societal expectations.
The Pressure Cooker
Corporate environments have a strange way of convincing people that everything is urgent, personal, and high-stakes. Most men I see aren’t struggling because they’re weak or unfocused. They’re struggling because they’ve been taught to keep pushing through exhaustion, silencing their instincts, and ignoring their own emotional warning signs.
This creates a kind of internal mutiny. One part of you wants to keep your job, maintain the peace, and secure your income. Another part wants to scream, quit, disappear, or burn it all down. Somewhere deeper, a quieter part watches all of this like a captain who’s lost command of the ship.
So the question becomes: Which part of you is sailing the boat today? And does that part deserve to be at the wheel?
Stop Trying to Be the Perfect Man
Here’s the truth most men whisper only when the door is closed:
"I am terrified of disappointing people."
You might be terrified of being seen as weak, replaced, or being “too much” or “not enough.” You might fear being seen as… well, you can fill in the blanks. But real maturity isn’t about polishing an image. It’s about making space for the parts of you that aren’t tidy for society. The tired part, the angry part, the numb part, and even the playful or rebellious part that just wants to break free.
You don’t have to act on every impulse you have, of course. But you do need to acknowledge them. You have to realise that you’re not a one-man show; you’re a crew inside you. Pretending that crew doesn’t exist is exactly what rocks the boat and makes people crack.
Let Yourself Slip Now and Then (You Won’t Break)
Slipping doesn’t mean failure. It means being human. You will lose focus. You will get overwhelmed. You will react in ways you don’t love. You will shut down sometimes. None of that means you’re weak. It means you’re carrying far more than anyone sees.
Your core strength isn’t your personality, job title, confidence, or whatever mask you’ve learned to wear. Your strength is the part of you that watches all of this in silence—the awareness behind your thoughts. This part of you is older than your identity and steadier than your moods. When you trust that deeper self, you stop giving so many f*cks about the noise around you. You will start to see clearly what is and isn’t worth your life force.
Men’s Mental Health Is Not a Side Issue
These pressures aren’t theoretical. They show up in the numbers:
More than 3 out of 4 suicides in the UK are men.
Suicide is the leading cause of death for men under 50.
Many more men experience depression, stress collapse, burnout, and emotional shutdown long before they reach a breaking point.
Work stress, job insecurity, financial pressure, and the fear of failure are major triggers reported by men.
These numbers highlight a system that hasn’t made space for men to express difficulties until it’s too late. I’m not speaking from theory. There were moments in my own life, especially during the worst years of my cPTSD, where I genuinely didn’t want to be here anymore.
After my sister died by suicide, something in me collapsed. I carried that grief like a shadow for years. There were days when the thought of following her felt like the only way to end the storm inside me, not knowing that more tragedies were on their way. Within a bit more than a decade, I lost my four siblings, dad, and mum—all members of my family. Those were the years where I learned that losing yourself is far easier than anyone admits.
Finding the way back wasn't easy. It was a long process of accepting life forces and being honest with myself. Honest about pain, fear, and the parts of me I’d rather hide. That honesty and commitment to myself first saved me.
If there’s one message I hope stays with you, it’s this:
You’re allowed to be human, feel pain, and still be powerful.
You’re allowed to slip, be wrong, and still be strong.
You’re allowed to STOP PERFORMING for others and come home only to yourself.
A Better Way to End the Year
None of us get through life without getting knocked sideways a few times. But the good news is: you’re still here. You’re still trying. You’re still doing your best to be a decent man in a world that keeps moving the goalposts.
As the year wraps up, take a moment for yourself—not in a dramatic “new year, new me” way, but in a grounded, human, mate to mate way:
You made it through another year of farewells, pressure, surprises, challenges, and curveballs.
You kept going even when parts of you wanted to tap out.
You showed up more than you probably give yourself credit for.
And that fcking counts, man. Just keep showing up as yourself, messy bits included. Life's balancing forces will help you get back on track. Trust life, and keep giving fewer fcks about others' expectations and more attention to what actually nourishes you.
Remember: you’re allowed joy, rest, humour, connection, softness, strength… all of it. We’re all learning as we go. And that’s enough.
HAPPY NEW YEAR, BRO.
Sergio Alexander Norton
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